Free Monologues - Habit

From The Locker Next 2 Mine

Habit, about 17 years old, speaks in an out of time moment.  In real time, she's hiding in a corner, afraid to come out and help her friend, Legolas, who's having a meltdown after discovering someone has painted everything in his locker black.  The character is female in the play, but there's no reason a male couldn't deliver this monologue.

(Warning: Using this monologue without permission is illegal, as is reproducing it on a website or in print in any way.)

I shouldn’t be here.
When my basketball coach died, back when I still played sports, back in sixth grade, I was the only player on the team who didn’t go to the funeral.  I had a piano lesson.  My mom has the phone in her hand, and she’s dialing my piano teacher, and I swear I almost grab it from her fingers.  I didn’t really do that, but I tell her no, I don’t know if Mr. McCleary has any other times for my lesson.  And my mom hangs up the phone, and that’s that.
And the day after the funeral, I hear them - all my teammates - talking about it and hugging, and I don’t know what to say.  I’m on the outside, and I will never again get back in.
I want that night back.  I want a do-over.  I want to let my mom make that call.  Maybe things would be different.  Like in those movies when people go back in time, and they change one thing, and when they get home they live in a mansion instead of a one plus one apartment, and their parents are happy and never scream things like “I see how you look at her” or “you’re such a bloodsucking bitch.”  I quit the piano six months later anyway.
(Beat.  Pointing at Legolas:)
I should be there.  But I just can’t.  I know if I take one step my insides will start to melt and my lungs will drown and I will end.  I am not ready for the end of the world.  Not yet.

Co-Chair of the Alliance of Los Angeles
, member of The Dramatists Guild of America, and life member of the Philadelphia Dramatists Center.

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Dear Chuck (one-act version)
Robert Morgan Senior High (Miami, FL), October 2017
Dear Chuck (one-act version)
Buckingham High School (Buckingham, VA), October 2017
Dear Chuck (one-act version)
Munford Middle School (Munford, AL), November 2017
Dear Chuck (one-act version)
KVCS Winslow Public School (Waterville, ME), November 2017
Dear Chuck (one-act version)
Nadia's Performance Studio (Wetherill Park, NSW, Australia), December 2017
After Math
Philip Barbour High School (Philippi, WV), December 2017
Dear Chuck (one-act version)
Hillard City School District (Columbus, OH), January 2018
Dear Chuck (one-act version)
Hillard City School District (Columbus, OH), January 2018
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Trinity Episcopal (Austin, TX), January 2018
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